17 July 2008

congratulations ryan and sara :)

i woke yesterday morning listening to my roommate Sara get ready for school. i just laid there listening to her brush her teeth. i walked into the bathroom we share and as i put in my contacts i noticed how she was just doing the normal get ready for the day routine. i watched as she breathed in and out just like every other day. she had taken a shower and put gel in her hair.

this was a normal day for her.

but this day was going to be different. this day would change her life.

i wanted to shout it to her. especially last night after we had a long conversation about wanting and desiring...about waiting and being patient.

i wanted to scream so loud, "SARA! this is it! it is going to happen TODAY! God is Good and he has GOOD things planned for you today. Ohhhh Sara! i wish you could know! I wish you could see what is in store for you today--all the beauty, ahhh the beauty of today!"

but i caught myself.

i wanted to shout to her, "oh, sweet sweet Sara. i know that last night you were wondering, you were thinking about the man you love and wondering what his plan is. I wish you could see what i see. I wish you knew that Ryan has a GREAT plan! I wish you could see that he has been planning for so long. that he is so excited to BE with YOU! ahh Sara he loves you so much. I want to somehow let you know so that you can stop loosing time thinking about this, so that your mind and heart can rest."

i had to leave the bathroom. i could not contain the knowledge of what was going to happen TODAY.

sara had no clue. no clue at all. her eyes were blind to the great story she was about to be a part of.

the plan was set and it was such a sweet and wonderful plan.

Ryan is in love with her. and has a ring. and a promise. and a love for her that cannot be quenched and so he has decided to ask her to be with him for the rest of her life. to become a part of him. to love him only. to serve him with his whole heart.

o this is too much to handle! to much goodness!

we both went to school. i was glad we both had school today--otherwise i would have burst with the news

i came home for lunch and shared some tuna with Sara. she was normal. normal sara making tuna. little did she know that she would retell every detail of this day over and over again to so many people, even the part about making tuna :)

i could barely eat my sandwich as our conversation turned to family and fathers and husbands and boyfriends...

i could see her mind churning, thinking about Ryan. and i had to stare at the ground to not shout to her

"Sara! in less than 3 hrs you will know! You will be reassured that he desires you and you alone. You will become aware of the plan he has been planning! your eyes will be opened to see! You will be overwhelmed with the grace of our Father, with His faithfulness to you and his promises to you"

eeek!

but we both finished our lunch and sara left to go back to school.

it wasn't too long after she got back home that the plan quickly unfolded.

I will leave the rest of the detail story-telling up to Sara :) after all this is her story. this is the story of the journey of her love for Ryan.

however, i can't help but see the resemblance between Sara and Ryan and myself and my God.

isn't beautiful that through people. humans who love and are loved by God resemble him and his characteristics.

I can't help but recognize his pursuit of me.

I wake up every morning to a new day. new mercies. new grace. fresh love from my God

I see the his sunrise every morning on my way to school.

I don't want to ever forget.

I don't want to lay in bed wondering if psalm 139 really is true anymore.

I don't want to worry. I am so tired of wasting precious time feeling unworthy and not good enough. why do i doubt the words of my creator?

He has promised me life and life to the fullest (john 10:10)

He has a good plan prepared for us.

i am so thankful that he continues to love me and continues to give me grace

it's as if I can feel him aching for us to know that we are loved. that his plan is perfect. that he knows every intricate detail of our lives. just like i ached all day to scream at sara!

and guess what... God IS screaming to us. loud through the people around us who contain His spirit. and His creation shouts from every mountain and every string of green grass that makes up our world

i pray we begin to honestly believe

i pray that I will honestly find my new identity in the love that my God has for me


7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awe... look at you being a girl!

I was expecting a slightly different twist to this post that involved a 2 hours trip to Post Oak Mall. I guess today is my lucky day though.

Jenn said...

thats awesome emily. thanks for the reminder.

schromiester said...

"i pray that I will honestly find my new identity in the love that my God has for me"

Hi Emily,

I stumbled upon your blog somehow, and I just wanted to say that I loved hearing your side of the story. And what you began talking about at the bottom is EXACTLY what I am going through right now. Even so specific that "identity" has been a word rolling around in my head the past two days. And I thought to myself, "I need to go have coffee with this girl." I don't know if you are a coffee person or not, but I really would love to go drink any liquid with you. Hopefully I will see you soon and ask you in person.

Kristin (Schroder)

Lindsey said...

this is so exciting! I am so glad I can read your blog and catch up on the happenings in college station!!

by the way, congratulations sara eaker, I hope this next season is so wonderful for you =)

kirsten said...

somehow i got here. and i poked around a little. we both love sara groves and we don't capitalize! seems like you're following hard after God. keep it up! He is so faithful!

debra parker said...

Emily. This is seriously beautiful. I teared up and all I can say is WOW. God is good. He is so good.

Anonymous said...

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Take Care Emily!
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Ps. I loved reading this post! I remember feeling all of those feelings not too long ago... :) thanks for that!